The call to adoption started long before my husband and I even realized. In fact, so much of what we've been through in our marriage has led up to what God has called and asked our family to be a part of.
Before Eric and I were even married, we both discussed how adoption was important to us and that it was something we wanted to pursue for our family when we were much older and any biological children of ours flew from our nest. We had made our own plan and dictated when, where, and how it would happen. Little did we know over 8 years ago when that discussion first came about, how the Lord would shift and change everything.
I didn't grow up with the calling or even the strong desire to become a mom. But when I met and fell in love with Eric, I knew right away I wanted to marry him and have children with him! I wanted the strong bond and love we have for each other to carry over into our children. And I totally wanted to have a huge family. While dating, we discussed the mutual desire to have a big family. To hear the pitter patter of little toes running through our home, or our schedule filled with soccer practices, piano lessons, or dirt bike competitions. We were married in August of 2011 and by January 2012 we started to try for our first baby. We had no idea of the heartache and prayers of desperation that would follow in the 2 years it took to become pregnant with our firstborn, Makenna. To say she is a miracle would be an understatement!!
We LOVE being parents. Makenna has brought out so much in us both and being her mom and dad has been our greatest joy and blessing. When she was around 6 months old, we started trying again for baby #2, knowing in our hearts that it may take a while like it did the first time around.
Not soon after we began trying, I was having quiet time one day in my bible when out of nowhere, I felt the Lord telling me that our second child was not meant to be biological. Adoption was not on our radar for anytime in the near future so I know this was a calling of the Lord and not my own desires trying to drown Him out. After relaying this to my husband, who immediately said "yes" (bless him..), it took over a year for us to navigate through this hefty calling that was placed on our family. It took over a year for us to navigate through loss after loss due to miscarriages and major heartache and pain. We wanted to make sure our hearts were in the right place before we pursued ANYTHING.
When we finally decided to walk in obedience to what we were being called to, Eric and I prayed together over what our next step looked like and we truly felt God lead us to foster care. We went in so blindly and so full of hope and emotion. We were licensed to foster in March of 2017 and since then have welcomed 7 beautiful children into our home. Children who were hard to lose from our home but we were overjoyed that families were being put back together.
Our 5th placement was a newborn baby boy who completely changed our world when he came to us at 2 days old. We fell in love with him immediately, as did our family and our church family. He was the child that God worked through to show how much we could love a child who wasn't biological to us. He was the child that God worked through to show us how adoption was meant to happen NOW and not years down he road. He was the child that God worked through to teach us how this calling was meant for our family and that our next step was to pursue private and domestic adoption. This little boy was with us for almost 4 months before being brought home to his grandmother. Our hearts ached at the loss of him but we pressed forward knowing that we had work to do. We had a calling that God placed in front of us and it was time to pursue it.
Through lots of investigating and prayer, we were led to Quiver Full Adoption agency and by July of 2018, we were officially a waiting family to work with them. Everything seemed to be moving so quickly. My calm and level headed husband never questioned a thing. Me on the other hand, I was a nervous wreck! My "yes" to God was a little hard to hand over. I knew nothing about adoption, except for the training we had received to become a home study approved family. I didn't know what ethical adoption looked like and I had so many doubts over the entire process, especially the financial aspect. But when God calls you to something, my oh my, does He make a way! For every step of this journey we've been through so far, God has shown up in the most miraculous ways! He continues to deliver the upmost peace in my seasons of double and worry. He's always working through my husband to give me exactly what my spirit needs as we press forward.
Now that we are an active family, not only have we been connected with an amazing community of hopeful adoptive parents, but we have been able to receive the most amazing education from a birth mother that Quiver Full Adoptions is associated and works closely with. We took a course with Ashley, from Lifetime Healing and we are so thankful. My once ignorant mind and understanding has been able to, and still continues to, absorb so much education from correct language to pursuing an ethical adoption. The education we still receive from Ashley and her other resources has been life changing and truly a gift from the Lord. Truly!
We have no clue of how the outcome of this journey to adoption will look like. We are still in the waiting of being chosen by an expectant mother. Sometimes the wait is hard, other times the wait is bearable. Remaining obedient has been a struggle but God continues to affirm and prove every day we are exactly where we are meant to be and we know that we are honoring Him by continuing to just say "yes!" He's shown us how His plans are so much better than ours and how trusting Him is always worth it. We are so honored and so humbled to be on this journey and truly cannot wait to see how the rest of this story unfolds.
-Written by Amanda Janson, a hopeful adoptive mom